No, really; standing up for yourself is necessary but it can be draining, the constant attrition of working with a pitful of snakes. No man is an island and in order to get through internships or apprenticeships or cadetships, one must make compromises. Example, being a highly likable and charismatic individual in an anglocentric work setting can get you far...up til the point where discussions of promotions and raises are brought up, and there you'll see just how extensive the bamboo ceiling really is.
This scene from Harold & Kumar hits the nail on the head:
I'm simply being realistic; when the board members are overwhelmingly anglo and jewish and they only promote comprador indians to middle management, you're wasting your energy and bandwidth trying to get even a team leader's role for 15-20% more in your income when that time could be better spent investing into a seperate side business, or investment property that could well take off and provide you with true financial independance.
Depends on your definition of winning and the parameters of Victory.
For me, victory is defined as financial security and the propagation of my family name, legacy and children and the rejuvenation of the Chinese nation. This necessarily means material gains must be acquired eg house, six fig job, assets and a lot of these items are zero sum against predominantly white and indian applicants. As part of their ploys for strategic advantage, white anglos will decry 'guanxi' and nepotism and virtue signal supposed objectivity, but ardently select for their own relatives and their own mates and this is done to the extreme shamelessly by indians.
Again, I have to disagree. I feel you've already locked yourself into a fixed mentality which you need to get out of. And I want to say something, which is not meant as an attack or to cast shade on your character in any way - I feel you've caged yourself in a victim "i can never succeed in this environment" mentality which is going to hurt you a lot in the long run, both professionally as well as personally and interpersonally. If you've already given up you cannot win. I repeat, if you've given up already in your heart and mind you cannot ever win.
I'll tell you a personal story - many, many years ago, I recall two counts of when I said I was Australian, and the other person asked "but where are you really from". The first time I was slightly annoyed, and the second time I decided f*ck it, if you can't accept me unconditionally, I won't prescribe to your views and identity. From then on, whenever asked, I would respond that I am Chinese. They would say, but you have an aussie accent, and I would say, yeah, I'm a citizen and I've lived here for quite a while. They would then get what I saw as a slightly confused and hurt expression, as if they were internally questioning "what is it about our identity that makes him reject it?".
Straight back atcha. I own my own destiny and identity, and I will make you question yours if you press me.
Because I can't stand living to someone else's expectations, if you cause inconvenience to me I am going to turn it around on you, in a socially, PC acceptable way of course, to put the onus on you as to why something is worth believing / enjoying / living. And with this attitude I've never taken sh*t from anybody, and no one seems to try to give it anymore either.
For anyone else in similar situations, I implore you to take charge of your own life and never be a victim, never assess yourself on someone else's standards, and never lock yourself into a self defeating mentality. Because it just doesn't need to be like that.
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The easy response to the Harold and Kumar scene is "Sorry man, but no can do. I've filled my dance card with xyz and am doing a special assignment for XXX (your director). You can go talk to him if you want, however anything on top of the current top projects list is going to cause big time delays". Just do a reverse uno. And it's not just you, they do it to anyone they think they can get away with. You just gotta show them the hoops they need to jump through to get something out of you.
If someone doesn't respect me, then I don't respect them. If it is not an equal relationship, then I seek to find ammunition that makes it equal, or ideally, tilted in my favor. Nobody gets to walk over me. When walking over has to happen, it's either me walking over them or nothing at all.
Maybe the US is different, but in AU the work environment is reasonably easy to deal with. Note: Jai Hinds don't get far in good Au companies either as they just feel off and inevitably do something (like hire a bunch of non qualified indians) that gets them fired faster than you can say "no spice".
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Addendum - I don't worry what others think. I don't give a damn about disapproving stares, if I ever get them, because I know deep down they wish they were me / in my position. I only care about the opinions of those close to me and my fellow Chinese, because they are my own people. Any outsiders that stand in my way, I will step over you while smiling, to get what is mine. Outsiders that stand in our way, well, we'll crush you in due time, and your children will be our slaves.
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Edit: I've never had any issues when it comes to raises, promotions. The vast majority of my experiences have been fair, and I don't think being in the eng/tech space is the reason. I have come across workers who have had the same observations as below, but their blind spot was always around some key character traits, such as not being able to handle criticism, not having a level of mental and emotional toughness towards legitimate and fair feedback, not standing their ground in even a slightly confrontational setting, etc.
There is a bamboo ceiling, don't get me wrong, but I see that more for the very high, C-level type positions, in which various other factors (including optics) comes into play. I think a big part of the ceiling is also people thinking that they have no chance, and not even trying, which is the greatest tragedy.
I just don't want to see people fall into the same trap that many have fallen into, and develop a victim mentality. Happy to talk further if you want, feel free to DM.
Example, being a highly likable and charismatic individual in an anglocentric work setting can get you far...up til the point where discussions of promotions and raises are brought up, and there you'll see just how extensive the bamboo ceiling really is.
