lets do it
i will steal, bottle, and sell the newly imported <
<100% sasuga JAPAN water>> to short bus weaboos at a criminally high markup before it even lands in the river, while also sterilizing a bunch of my potential competitors for the special olympics in the process.
u give me that spicy water, i will use it to make myself rich, to realize my childhood dream of being a world champion athlete, to battle global catastrophes like overpopulation, and to safeguard our next generation from intellectual disabilities - something which protects ALL of our futures.
and
that is why you godless commies will never win! you cannot copy that industrious american spirit! im certain you puny AZNs would have just "accepted" the """fact""" that radioactive contaminants are not a delicious and refreshing
SUPER_SEASONING™ that
automatically burns calories for you after you've enjoyed your meal. This miracle invention makes it possible to enjoy
more of your favorite dishes, and spend
more of your time doing what you love, so you can say goodbye to all that frustrating exercise! When you choose
H2ONee-chan™, you enjoy on
YOUR terms.
unlike
you creatures, we here in the LAND OF THE FREE are able to USE our god given freedom to think BEYOND your MARXIST horizons!!. i value INDIVIDUALISM and NOVELTY and MONEY and MONEY, and I can leverage those values - the ones that made Western Civilization the pinnacle of human accomplishment* - to achieve something for myself, with my own desires in mind, and for nobody else's benefit but my own! WHY would i bow down to Communist GROUPTHINK like you, and then spend forever agonizing over how to """safely""" and """responsibly""" dispose of the """never ending source of deadly ionizing radiation""" when I could channel my American brilliance into making money at the expense of everybody else ???
THIS is innovation! THIS is progress, and
THIS is why american ingenuity will beat chinese obeisance and "critical thinking" with a 0.9999999% probability (that's almost 100% guaranteed). so... once you silly """ASIANS""" take your red and yellow eye_patches off, maybe one day you'll see the world just as well as an american. Everybody with a brain knows that our patented
WAIFU-238™ blend, which we use to
Power_Up! our already exquisite beverages, is being targeted by Big Pharma and The Democrats. They know this could be the nail in the coffin for their COMMUNIST, ILLEGITIMATE, Deep State agenda... and they're scared. Don't be fooled by their whining and whinging, they want to manipulate you and enslave
your mind; and they know they can force their seeds deep inside your unprotected brain, by starting with something like this. We have hired MULTIPLE (~2.5, one of them is very short) doctors to ensure our safety metrics are compliant, so, once they're finished doctoring everything, we will prove these manipulators wrong.
*if you ignore the bits that don't support this conclusion