because USAF were quite adamant that IRST is for weak old worlders .
F-22 was originally destined to have IRST and fancy cheek array but well, funding caps and peace dividend happen. the IRST tho, i feel it still have its own set of challenge, namely how it can provide a proper range measurement.
Long range IRST are possible and practical, especially with availability of High D-star/specific detectivity detector based on either QWIP or high performance Mercury Cadmium Telluride CCD/FPA's. But passive ranging remains hard. The US tried that fancy podded IRST with datalink antenna so planes can do triangulation, but single ship ranging remains challenging.
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F-15EX will have an easier time against other fifth gen.
I would still feel F-15EX will have problem against 5th gen, it will still requires some force multipliers such as AEW's or something like say APY-9 or E-7's to help cue the APG-82's.
The APG-82 is indeed a massive improvement over 63's like 5 times the power, but 4th root Radar propagation laws are still cruel when facing low RCS targets. Also the platform itself have high RCS. Boeing representative a collegue met sometime ago claimed that EX have some treatment to reduce RCS, i suspect it would be similar as F-15FX proposal to Japan years ago,and Russian Su-35's but as i see so far it's kinda hard to reduce the RCS below say something like F-16's almost impractical unless somehow entire aircraft are coated which definitely not practical or desireable from maintenance perspective.
and the J-20's own radar and sensor. I'm in opinion that the J-20 have the biggest aperture among 5th gen. It may see the EX first and execute engagement early.